fueledbyparawhores:

fueledbyparawhores:

I was convinced that it was all mental - only in my head - and we took the stage that night anyways. But the way it ended left me with a bigger mental battle and serious throat problems. I walked off the stage with 3 songs left to perform and without explaining to the crowd what was going on. My voice had totally shut off and I was barely even able to speak. So after the guys came backstage to find me and figure out what was going on, I was horrified at the idea of going back out to see what Pomona thought about it. Josh assured everyone that it was the right thing to do. He was turning 22 that night. as if the night wasn’t already a big enough deal to all of us.

So the guys walked back on stage, without me. Josh told the crowd that I couldn’t sing and that they should sing to me, loud enough that I could hear from where I was sitting. And as they ripped into “Misery Business” and the crowd began to sing my parts, karaoke style.. I sat on the floor, in a corner backstage listening and crying like a dumb little baby.

):